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You Suck
Christopher Moore
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
Chapter One
Get Over It, a Lot of People Are Dead
Chapter Two
The Last Poop
Chapter Three
I am Poor and My Cat Is Huge
Chapter Four
Red and White and Dead all Over
Chapter Five
The Emperor of San Francisco
Chapter Six
Do Animals Get the Blues?
Chapter Seven
The List
Chapter Eight
She Walks in Beauty
Chapter Nine
It's Like Time Travel, Only You know, Slower…
Chapter Ten
Red, White, and Blue, Not Necessarily in That Order
Chapter Eleven
Then, When They Woke Up
Chapter Twelve
Blood, Coffee, Sex, Magix—Not necessarily in That Order
Chapter Thirteen
Moving Day
Chapter Fourteen
Powers for Good
Chapter Fifteen
Broken Clowns
Chapter Sixteen
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
Completely Fucked Servant of the Vampyre Flood
Chapter Seventeen
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
Newly Baptized Minion of the Night
Chapter Eighteen
Nobody Likes a Dead Whore
Chapter Nineteen
Our Dead Homeys
Chapter Twenty
It's a Wonderful Life
Chapter Twenty-one
Ladies and Gentlemen, Presenting the Disappointments
Chapter Twenty-two
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
Pathetic Nosferatu Noobsicle
Chapter Twenty-three
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
The Hunted
Chapter Twenty-four
The Half-Life of American Cheese
Chapter Twenty-five
They Know Not What They Do
Chapter Twenty-six
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
Star-Crossed Lover and Tragic Fatale
Chapter Twenty-seven
Well, That Was Fucked Up
Chapter Twenty-eight
Wallflowers of the Night
Chapter Twenty-nine
Don't You Hate Running into Your Ex?
Chapter Thirty
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
Dark and Mysterious Goddess of Forbidden Love
Chapter Thirty-one
Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal:
Not Unlike the Toaster, I Control the Darkness
