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An Israeli woman with large breasts is calling my name.
I hate my mother.
“It was a snowball rolling down a hill.”
“You’re in trouble, Sanskrit.”
“The universe is not what we think it is.”
“Your grandpa was a real mamzer bastard.”
“They’re girls, not gods.”
“You think you’re number one, but you’re not.”
“This is a trial, but it will pass.”
“You’re killing me. I’m dying.”
“I’ve got a little situation, professor.”
“Excruciating.”
“Mucous. Lots of it.”
“Sat nam.”
“Namaste.”
“Don’t ruin this for me!”
“Is that what a guru looks like?”
“I’m worried about you.”
“Mom is in love.”
“He’s come for you.”
“They will find us.”
“You’re off balance, Sanskrit.”
“Busy. Always very busy.”
“Nice to see you again, Zuckerman family.”
I have to change my life.
“He’s here!”
“It’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
“I’m proud of you.”
“Do you love beef?”
I’m going away.
“You’re awfully quiet.”
“Where’s Mom going?”
“Wake up.”
“How could she just leave you here alone?”
“My life is just beginning.”
“I want to talk man-to-man.”
“You have no idea where you’re going, do you?”
“I’m miserable.”
Ohhhh—
“How do you know you can trust the guru?”
“We’ve got a surprise for you, Mom.”
“Mom is upside down, and it’s all your fault.”
“Celebrate love!”
“A moment.”
“I don’t believe in you.”
“How could you forget about it?”
“Why does God bring suffering upon us? What purpose does it serve?”
“I don’t know who you are anymore.”
“A betrayal.”
“You got what you wanted.”
“It’s time.”
“I’ve got everything on a list.
I just need to find the list.”
“Red lights are optional.”
“We’re truly sorry
it didn’t work out.”
There’s nothing else to say.
Acknowledgments
Other books by Allen Zadoff
Copyright
